I have been exhausted feeling all week. I have done a bunch of research into dopamine and tiredness, but it is hard to say where the feeling is coming from.

The lethargic rats who wont even get up to get a drink of water, make me think that when you are low on dopamine you may be more tired, but it is tough to say becasue we can’t ask the rats how they feel.

I have dealt with depression before and that is supposedly a lack of dopamine, and it certainly feels like  being very tired. The weird thing is that it is not just a lazy feeling but an actual ability to sleep a lot.

I have written about this weird feeling before. I don’t understand how you can feel tired if you have eaten healthy foods and had 8 hours of sleep. There must be something more going on inside the brain.

I have read that dopamine is reregualated in your brain during sleep, but I am having pretty good sleeps so that doesn’t really answer any questions.

I think that it is from being sick and still trying to recover while mixing in a lot of exercise still, but this tiredness is way stronger than I would expect from even that.

I have taken a 30 minute nap almost every day this week and actually fallen asleep for the full thirty minutes. That is not like me at all.

I am hoping that a good relaxing Sunday will do the trick, but I am wondering if the stress of life is starting to get to me. In that case, doing nothing for a whole day probably wont be overly useful…

Still, I think that I should be able to find peace in God, even if I don’t have a job or any good prospects…

I have been editing my last journal and I am at a part where I got obsessed with figuring out what my identity was. I think that knowing your identity is you best protection against stress when life is not going your way.

I still haven’t really put my finger on my own identity. I have become more aware of my importance in the overall scheme of the universe. I know that if God loves me than I must be important.

I know that sounds weird coming from a tiny insignificant human on a tiny insignificant planet, but some how I think I need to buy into the idea. That will get me out of bed in the morning and keep me going all day!

The problem is that I still dont know what to do. I need to accept that it may not be anything special. If I can help just one person I may have played my part.

This is hard for me to accept. I really want to be someone special as far as humanity is concerned. This is a prideful feeling that can lead to only bad things, but it is still really difficult to defeat…

Anyway, I am going to bed early again. Hopefully, I get a turn around in my mood soon!