There were quite a few times when I managed to quite it and sleep for hours, but every now and then it went nuts.
If you have read my other journal, you know that controlling the brain is one of the most important things you need to do if you want this detox to be effective. The imagination is what feeds expectations, and expectations are what feed the dopamine system.
One of my two main runaway mental processes is planning.
It starts off healthy. There is no problem with having a plan. I make a three thing to do list and I give myself an idea of when I want to get those things done.
However, then I run it over a second time in more detail. I think I visualize it in my head, and I begin even imagining how I’ll feel when I am done. The point where I know it has gone too far is when I start imagining a discussion with someone about how awesome it feels to have completed my daily plan.
It gets worse. Throughout the day my mind gets caught up in crazy little planning sessions. What I will eat. Exactly how and when my workout sessions will go. Planning back up plans for plans that I think might be too difficult…
All while I should be in the zone doing work.
This is the main error with the planning phenomenon. You have no right to be thinking about a plan when you have work to be doing. The current plan is your responsibility.
For me, this is a real and major issue. It is some kind of unhealthy love of myself, or maybe another escape mechanism.
All I know is that when I stop doing it I feel better and get more done.
Today I did a good job staying with the task at hand and it showed in the work I got done. I finished my 3 thing list, made an even harder one for tomorrow, and even got extra work done.
My cold is still bothering me, but it is still getting better. Tomorrow is the half way point! Woop!
3 Thing To Do List
- Five hours of book editting
- Two hours on conclusion
- Fifteen minute Run